2 issues bugging me

Since I am moving to this new apartment, I have a few things that I need to do. Now you guys might not find these very important but believe me, some of these things have been driving me nuts.

1. There are these 2 trees just in front of our balcony (we have the ground floor). Actually they are not very tall. The taller of those is about 10 inches tall so I am not sure if you can call them trees. I have plans of buying an easy chair and putting it in the porch so that I could relax while looking at the scenery in front. I have a vague feeling that those wretched trees might block my view. Some people have dismissed this as paranoidal fear pointing out to me that my line of sight would probably lie significantly above 10 inches from the ground but I am not buying that. Even if I agree that they would not interfere with my leisure now, who knows what they might be upto say 5 months from now. Who is going to stop them from growing say 2 feet tall? What will I be supposed to do when they spread their deadly tentacles to occupy the best portions of the porch ? I think I have to act and I have to act fast and with purpose. I have to wait for an oppurtune moment in the dead of the night and wrench them out of the ground when no one is watching and then cover up my tracks. But then I also have to think about the repercussions when the neighbours suddenly one fine day find a garden with two less trees. Maybe I will need to pace myself. You know, take one leaf out every night so that no one will notice this extremely gradual withering. 2 months of hard work but lo and behold: a clean, unobstructed view. Me:1 Nature+Miramar Apartments: 0. Actually there are two more trees after these two but they are just too big for my expertise. My ego is big but just not big enough to confront them so I will satisfy it by pulling out the smaller ones.

2. I have recently noticed that my new cereal bowl is far too big. I mean, its garangutan. It almost holds the whole box of cereal. For the quantity of cereal I eat, I need to throw stones in the bowl so that the milk and cereal may come up (like the crow did). Its not just that. The bowl is so big, it takes 5 minutes for the cereal I throw in to reach the bottom and 3 minutes for the sound of 'thud' to come up. So I need to wait for 8 minutes after I throw the cereal in before I could make plans of eating it. Nothing serious but I find that a bit inconvenient.

Well, this is all that is bugging me now. I am sure you will all agree that these are really important problems and would drive any sane person nuts. Each one individually is challenging enough to require the undivided attention of a normal human being. Together, they are almost killing a sub-intelligent creature like me.

Blue

Well, I am in one of those blue moods again. Maybe its the conference I am attending. I somehow become much more aware of the futility of it all when I see a bunch of middle aged over enthusiasts vainly trying to impress upon the audience as to how their work is fundamentally different from that of all those who have walked on the same path before. I keep listening to all these presentations and after a certain amount of time, it just becomes all so monotonous and routine. Novelty gives way to boredom. Technology starts looking mundane. Every other plot becomes that much more incomprehensible and the technical jargon effectively blurs out whatever little meaning that the author was trying to communicate in the first place. I have formally come to the conclusion that Conferences suck. There are far too less people really interested in getting something out of the presentations, myself not being one of them. Most of them are there just to increase their contacts by that despicable act of 'Networking' and I am not in it even for this. Which makes me think, Why am I really here. I do have a presentation tomorrow but mostly its the advisor on my throat. If only I could get out of attending any future conferences.

The best part of the trip has been my visit to San Francisco which I think is the main reason for the blueness of my mood. I drove upto the Golden Gate bridge, spent some time in the shivering wind, staring down at the water below, met a friend in a lovely little cafe, had a little chat and then drove back to Palo Alto, which being part of Bay Area (Silicon Valley) sucks by the way. Anyways, the fact is, somethings are just so perfect, they leave an aftertaste of desire for more. They make you re-evaluate your priorities and make you wonder about the worthiness of your life. The trip to San Francisco was so perfect, I do not even want to go and present tomorrow.

It has sporadically occured to me, but I feel that most of us are not doing enough with our lives. We could certaily do with a dose of refined culture, a sprinkling of a bit of art, you know, the good things in life. Our lives lead paths which are too well defined to allow for the excitement that results from unpredictability. Our daily routines are far too rigid and I wonder how exactly am I able to spend every other day with the exact same schedule, without anything special to look forward to. Somehow, we have managed to become so subservient to the monotonicity permeating our routines, we have actually become immune to its cruel realization. We forget how much more we could pack in every single minute. We tend to overlook the fact that, well, its a continually passing oppurtunity, a priviledge that we get just once, and its slipping from our fingers with every passing minute. Its high time we (or atleast I) stop living just to eat, just to fulfill the next deadline, just to burn the day's quota of calories, just to see who gets thrown out of Indian Idol, just to complete another day because lets face it, if we ever try to look at the big picture, it will be plainly apparent as to how priceless each day could be and how mercilessly we are wasting them away.

Maybe I am wrong. Maybe its just because I am in one of those blue moods today :).

Ramblings of the dazed and the exhausted

Well, I am sitting here in this Air-India flight bound to LA. It has just taken off from Frankfurt which means that 8 hours of the stipulated 18 hours of torture is over.

Delhi airport this time was unbearable. Huge lines, faulty baggage scanners leading to delays, inefficient flight staff which meant the average standing time in a queue consisting of 5 people was atleast an hour and airport roofs dripping under the effect of the recent torrential downpours. The flight started late by about 2 hours which is a harbinger of inconveniences to come as I would most probably miss my LA-SD connection and since that connection is the last one in the day, I would probably have to spend the night in the airport unless I decide to drive down to SD in a rental car.

Here in the aircraft, things don't seem to be much better with one of the Air-Hostesses almost slitting my throat open from ear to ear when I asked her for a clarification over some confusion regarding the immigration forms.

"Yes ?"
"Actually, I need the other form too.", I said with a sheepish almost guilty smile.
"But I just asked you. You just needed one form then. How come you changed your mind, huh ?"
"Actually, I did not hear you clearly and when I do not hear something clearly, I just say yes. I am really sorry. It won't happen again. Please don't slit my throat open from ear to ear."
"OK. Better beware next time.", and with this she gave me a glimpse of her hatchet, its sharp edges gleaming with an evil shine, its countenance barely hiding a grisly longing for human blood.

So I have decided to shut the hell up and read the newspaper I had bought at the Delhi Airport. OK, its Times of India so I should probably not call it a newspaper. The headlines are boring and to a high degree stupid. Their take on Sports sensationalistic at best and their coverage of local issues miniscule to say the least. Page 3 seems to have the highest amount of action. I have noticed something very peculiar about the Page-3 of TOI. Why does it always come on Page-2 ? Anyways, I look at the polls for today. 7% have replied 'Can't Say'. I cannot believe what kind of a stupid answer is that. Why does anyone have to go through the pains of booting up his computer, connecting the internet, launching IE, opening his mail, and then sending an email response to TOI poll with an opinion of 'Can't Say'. If you 'Can't Say', you might as well 'Not Say'. When you come to look at it, its just a 'Yes' and a 'No' question. How difficult can it be ? Roll the dice and take your chances. Unless your answer could jeopardize national security over socially irrelevant and intellectually insulting questions, JUST SAY IT. I cannot believe that all these serials and news shows on TV are running polls where their third option is 'Can't Say'. Way to piss off your six rupees. Just send them an SMS at premium rates with your choice as 'C'.

Actually I had a lot of things in mind but I seem to have forgotten all of them. So I will just stop here. While on the flight from Delhi to Frankfurt, there was this nice lady sitting beside me who teaches Yoga in Oregon and had gone to Pune to learn from a guru. It was nice talking to her and the 8 hours did not seem all that long. The remaining 10, I am afraid, are going to be excruciating.